I didn’t start with a plan. Back in high school, I barely had a direction. I knew I didn’t want the life everyone else was preparing for, but I didn’t know what I did want either. So I drifted. I let time move me instead of moving through it with intention.
And because I had no vision, I couldn’t see anything. I kept reaching for some imaginary “something else,” something outside myself. But the whole time, the thing I was looking for was just the courage to see what was right in front of me.
After high school, I realized something kind of brutal: if I wanted any real sense of fulfillment, I was going to have to build it myself. Piece by piece. Mistake by mistake. Wheel by reinvented wheel.
An online business became the anchor. Not because I wanted to be a genius or a guru — but because I wanted freedom. Freedom from location. Freedom from time. Freedom from ceilings and permission and waiting.
And somewhere along the way, I learned I have a complicated relationship with time. I’m always aware of it, but never living inside it. Moments blur together — fast, slow, then gone — like I’m watching my own life from outside the frame.
But I kept going. I kept trying to build something real with whatever pieces I had. I kept failing, adjusting, failing again, and trying again anyway.
Fast-forward to late 2024 — that’s when things really shifted. That was my first real push. My first attempt to spark Project Fishtank into something more than a concept. Life kept life’ing, and I kept stumbling, recovering, drifting, and returning. But every time I fell off, something in me turned back toward the vision like it was home.
Months passed. I wasn’t consistent, but I was devoted. And eventually, that devotion turned into something like momentum — the slow, stubborn kind that doesn’t look impressive but changes your life anyway.
I wrote in my notes that I was going to change. And for the first time, I meant it.
When I put my foot in the ground a year ago, that was my stake. My declaration. My checkpoint. The moment I told myself: “This is the chapter I stay. This is the chapter I grow.”
I’ve had highs. I’ve had lows. Enough of both to now push my foot three times deeper into the ground and say: I’m doing this for real. I can’t let my dreams just sit there anymore. If I could talked to myself back then, I’d tell him to plant that foot sooner — trust the process instead of judging it.
Because once you stop judging, you learn. Once you learn, you build. And once you build, momentum stops being a myth.
It’s messy. It’s dysfunctional. But it’s mine. And it’s getting better.
I’ve carved my own way through every chapter, even when I had no sense of where the next one would go. For a long time, life felt like a hallway of decisions I didn’t fully understand, yet I kept moving through them anyway.
Call it instinct. Call it hope. Call it survival. All I knew was: staying in the same place never felt like an option.
Piece by piece, I started recognizing the shape of the life I wanted — not because someone showed me, but because I failed enough times to know what I don’t want.
And that clarity… it changed everything.
So now? I’m betting on me. Fully. Completely.
This is Project Fishtank. Expect a newsletter every Thursday. Expect videos. Nothing perfect — but everything honest. Self-mastery, video games, solopreneurship, the whole ecosystem of becoming the version of myself I’ve been circling for years.
I want to explore the world. I want to clear my backlog. I want to get back in shape, catch up on the media I ignored, and build something that actually sustains me. Something I can be proud of. Something that gives me options.
And if that means taking risks? Then yeah — I’m taking them.
Because the safest thing I can do now… is move.
I’m letting the past versions of me live through this one. I’m letting them see the world they never got the chance to. I’m earning the experience they wanted.
So here’s the truth: I’m living now. Fully. Actively. Deliberately.
And if you’re watching this, if you’re reading this, if you’re tapping into this energy at all… then maybe you’re supposed to start moving too.
Because I’m building this in real time. And if I can change my story, you can change yours.
One step.
One rep.
One chapter.
At a time.
Thanks for reading
-Maurijon
